Blog / Recovery Diaries

  • Recovery Diary 04/07/19

    Do you ever miss it? The release that it offered you? The sweet bliss of nothing at all? The emptiness? The shrinking? The isolation? The secrets? I miss it sometimes. When I am alone I hear the disease whispering to me from the crevices of my mind. The eating disorder lived up there for so […]
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  • Recovery Diary 3/1/19

    In honor of NEDA’s Eating Disorder Awareness Week theme “come as you are” Come as you are broken and bruised, triumphant and free, or tired and used Come as you are black, brown, white, red, or yellow Come as you are straight, gay, trans Jew, Muslim, Buddhist whatever you may choose    Come as you […]
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  • Recovery Diary 2/27/19

      Eating Disorder Awareness Week I didn’t know eating disorder awareness week existed until I went to treatment. Treatment changed me, opened me up to ideas, movements, advocacy, and hope. It showed me the army of people fighting on the other side of this disease, which is an illness I convinced myself for many years […]
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  • Recovery Diary 2/09/19

    I’m 13 hours ahead of everyone back home. Saturday is ending, while in Chicago the sun just came up. Time is a warped concept that leaves me feeling upside down and backwards, never quite knowing what to make of its strange and twisted factors. The half-moon is in three days. The tides are slowly receding […]
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  • Recovery Diary 01/11/19

    Sometimes life takes you in its grips, twirls you around, and leaves you dazed and confused about what day, time, or month you are living in. I haven’t written consistently in two months or so, and I feel this intense loosening of my spirit. Disconnection has become a consistent friend. My legs feel as if […]
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  • Recovery Diary 10/29/18

    Stick with it. It gets better. Trust me. -Note to self Everything is different moment by moment. Things peak and then crash each time I open my mouth to breathe. My lungs are unstable pipe bombs that vacillate between filling with fire or cotton, leaving me to either breathe out sparks or clouds. Waking up […]
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